Opinion

That Was So 2015

Words: Ashley Berry

The year 2015 was a long, crazy year filled with social media madness, terrible clothing trends, and much, much more. Despite this, there were also many great achievements that defined 2015: the Supreme Court ruled in favor of same-sex marriage, the U.S. Women’s Soccer Team won the World Cup, and the first woman of color won an Emmy Award for Best Leading Actress (Viola Davis). Hopefully, 2016 will be full of similar achievements, and we can leave the following behind:

  • The Dress

Was it black and blue or gold and white? This silly dress caused as much controversy as that Christmas-less red Starbucks’ cup. The dress actually tore friendships apart because people were so determined they knew which color it really was. Now that it’s 2016, does anyone really care? Probably not, so let’s leave it behind.

  • Netflix and Chill

Thank God for Netflix! Not only does it give us an excuse to procrastinate, but it also gives us a sense of accomplishment when we finish four seasons of a show in one sitting. But now, thanks to 2015 pop culture, there is a stigma associated with the statement, “Let’s watch Netflix,” so can we please leave this concept behind and just get our Netflix binge on?

  • Complicated Bathing Suits

If you try on a bathing suit and can’t figure out where to put your arms, there’s a serious problem. Is it a one-piece or a two-piece? What are all those extra straps for? They may look great on a model in a photo shoot, but who actually wants to spend ten minutes getting into that contraption, and who wants those tan lines?

  • Zayn Leaving One Direction

OMG NO WAY! It happened. One Direction went two different directions and your favorite foreign boy band is forever broken. The four remaining members are on a break, presumably looking for a “new” direction. So, sit back, relax, and take bets on which direction the boys will go. If they return, let’s appreciate that the boys are back and get over it.

  • Kylie Jenner Lip Challenge

Have you seen the pictures? That’s all that needs to be said.

  • Man Buns

Pick up a pair of scissors, cut that mess off of your head, and walk proudly into 2016. You can thank me later!

  • Crocs

I was convinced these were left behind years ago, but somehow Crocs made a surprising comeback in 2015. It’s time we all agree to make 2015’s Crocs comeback a onetime thing, and leave them behind forever. Plastic shoes are bad for our environment and just plain ugly.

  • The Whip and Nae Nae

With every New Year comes a new dance craze that is more ridiculous than the one before and 2015 was no different. The Whip and the Nae Nae took 2015 by storm and its corresponding song “Watch Me” was as annoying as, “What does the Fox Say.” Who would have thought that one song could make pretending to drive a car with one hand and waving like the uptight Queen of England so popular. Inevitably, 2016 will bring with it a new dance craze, so it’s time to stop “hitting the whip”.

  • Hoverboards

Where is the Consumer Product Safety Commission when you need them? Americans want to “hover” like Michael J. Fox in “Back to the Future” so bad that they are willing to pay hundreds of dollars for what is essentially a segway without the handlebars. It doesn’t even hover; it rolls on two wheels. Some models unexpectedly burst into flames. I don’t know about you, but last time I checked, you couldn’t pay me to stand on top of a burning log, so why on earth would anyone pay to do that? Next time you think about riding a hoverboard, ride it straight back to 2015.

  • “Goals”

You have your own life, so please live it and stop focusing on all the unrealistic photos of couples on the Internet. Like most media, the Internet paints an unrealistic picture of life, so the next time you see a photo of the life you think you want, remember it’s probably not realistic and cut yourself some slack.

  • Selfie Stick

How bad is your double chin that you need to mount your $300 phone on a $20 stick just so you can take a post-worthy selfie? Have we become so vain that we insist on using these devices, which are banned in many amusement parks and other populated areas because of the accidents they cause? To be fair, it’s not the selfie stick’s fault, but instead poor choices made by users, like riding a motorcycle or roller coaster and losing your grip. While the concept was unique, user error abounds and we clearly are not intelligent enough to use selfie stick technology.

  • Dying Armpit Hair and Glitter Beards

Were these seriously things? I still can’t wrap my head around it. No, just NO!

  • Eyebrow Game

Stop drawing on your eyebrows and obsessing over whose eyebrows are most “on fleek.” If you are following the trend, the more “on fleek” you think your eyebrows are, the more likely they are not! Eyebrows exist for the sole purpose of keeping sweat from dripping in your eyes. Don’t shave them off, color them in, or use them to make yourself look like a clown. From those of us who have tried not to stare at your crazy, uneven eyebrows, thank you for leaving them behind.

  • Birkenstock Sandals

I get it, you have wide feet and very little fashion sense, but why wear the same shoes as Fred Flintstone? Even Velma and Betty wore something more stylish. So, send those shoes back to Bedrock and find the nearest DSW. They’re all over the place in 2016.

For more breaking news and photos, follow The Wingspan on Instagram and Twitter @CHSWingspan.

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